Whenever we think weve lost a customer, instantly we fear that our loss will be our archrivals gain.

That happens a lot. But its not the worst scenario.

Bill, who owns his own consulting business, was never that fond of flying. Even being bumped up to first-class and being plied with liquor, lost its cache for him.

Then, September 11 came along, and flying got a lot worse. He had to arrive at the airport earlier, and this cut into his consulting time. He had to pack differently, leaving his favorite Swiss Army knife behind.

Airplanes and airports were more congested; his checked luggage was lost more often.

And the miles he earned were becoming meaningless because the last thing he wanted to do when he earned a vacation was seeing more airports, hotels, and rental cars, even if they were free.

Then, it happened, the proverbial straw that broke Bills back.

He was told hed have to check his only bag because it wasnt going to fit in the overhead compartment on the plane. He disagreed, voices grew louder, and an embarrassing episode followed.

Sure enough, his flight was late, making him late to his meeting. Had he been able to carry on his bag, he would have arrived out of breath, but under the wire.

On the flight home, he vowed not only to not use that carrier again. He decided to get off the road, to stop flying altogether.

This necessitated changing his business model. Hed have to do more phone work, and conduct his out of town selling though videoconferences, web talks, and other devices, but he figured when all was said and done, hed cut costs and come out ahead.

More important, hed spend more of his nights at home with his family, his waistline would be smaller, and his stress would abate.

What the airline never appreciated was the fact that it didnt just shuttle Bills business to another carrier; it lost a customer for the entire industry.

When a customer defects to our rival, he may come back to us later, having seen, first hand, that the grass wasnt greener. But when he washes his hands of an industry, friends and foes alike, lose.

This happens more than customer service models and surveys recognize, because few of us have the imagination to ask this question:

Are you fed up with us, or with everyone?

If its the latter, thats a sad commentary on the perceived service level of the industry.